I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
my being single is dangerous.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
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I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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