Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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