What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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