Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
