I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize