I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
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I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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