Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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