I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
