im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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