If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
