nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
vagina is talking i cant
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
