All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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