ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
