You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
