i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
