Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads http://tfl.nu/yn7g
  Replies (24) Good night (618) Bad night (7073)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way. http://tfl.nu/4k3o
  Replies (30) Good night (4948) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye

  (319): View more from Iowa

  Wasn't she moving abroad?

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Are you really going to debate this?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye (319): Wasn't she moving abroad? (419): Are you really going to debate this? http://tfl.nu/djv0
  Replies (85) Good night (1620) Bad night (5530)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know. http://tfl.nu/0mbm
  Replies (20) Good night (5229) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch. http://tfl.nu/qemq
  Replies (15) Good night (1231) Bad night (4280)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches. http://tfl.nu/xanx
  Replies (10) Good night (3478) Bad night (1221)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter. http://tfl.nu/rjmj
  Replies (10) Good night (4397) Bad night (1155)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am. http://tfl.nu/r9i0
  Replies (7) Good night (1526) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about http://tfl.nu/ldbx
  Replies (5) Good night (1209) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin? http://tfl.nu/mg03
  Replies (7) Good night (602) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes? http://tfl.nu/cea8
  Replies (15) Good night (2888) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit. http://tfl.nu/gsje
  Replies (5) Good night (543) Bad night (1455)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other. http://tfl.nu/l9kx
  Replies (9) Good night (432) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (438): View more from Quebec

  I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.

  (1-438): View more from Quebec

  God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.

  (438): View more from Quebec

  Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (438): I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents. (1-438): God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol. (438): Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss http://tfl.nu/li35
  Replies (2) Good night (807) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church. http://tfl.nu/aslp
  Replies (2) Good night (408) Bad night (127)

Randomize