Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.

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(580): I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch. http://tfl.nu/axjt

Replies (31) Good night (6042) Bad night (921)
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(614): View more from Ohio

her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny

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(614): her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny http://tfl.nu/5yjp

Replies (38) Good night (900) Bad night (4820)
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(407): View more from Florida

I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?

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(407): I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!? http://tfl.nu/85fy

Replies (18) Good night (9549) Bad night (1127)
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(847): View more from Illinois

he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?

(952): View more from Minnesota

You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....

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(847): he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad? (952): You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him.... http://tfl.nu/ht91

Replies (37) Good night (2076) Bad night (7937)
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(850): View more from Florida

She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever

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(850): She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever http://tfl.nu/uwj0

Replies (18) Good night (6002) Bad night (1317)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize

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(403): I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize http://tfl.nu/xooj

Replies (17) Good night (4104) Bad night (1415)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.

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(402): He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him. http://tfl.nu/b1lr

Replies (8) Good night (3847) Bad night (1532)
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(912): View more from Georgia

I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her

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(912): I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her http://tfl.nu/j3sh

Replies (9) Good night (3327) Bad night (911)
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(210): View more from Texas

The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.

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(210): The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him. http://tfl.nu/79ut

Replies (9) Good night (4839) Bad night (1083)
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(515): View more from Iowa

I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.

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(515): I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises. http://tfl.nu/86bb

Replies (5) Good night (647) Bad night (1553)
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(269): View more from Michigan

He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?

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(269): He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated? http://tfl.nu/6x14

Replies (16) Good night (877) Bad night (3665)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.

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(717): It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me. http://tfl.nu/ym25

Replies (9) Good night (855) Bad night (1166)
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(619): View more from California

He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.

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(619): He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft. http://tfl.nu/kmfz

Replies (1) Good night (274) Bad night (697)
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(314): View more from Missouri

That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.

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(314): That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu. http://tfl.nu/ssef

Replies (7) Good night (668) Bad night (420)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Why is there a cash register on top of my car?

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(215): Why is there a cash register on top of my car? http://tfl.nu/nfm6

Replies (1) Good night (393) Bad night (181)

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