Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
