I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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