The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize