R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
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