Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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