we have pet lesbian snakes
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Can you bring me the toilet please
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
