My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize