with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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