I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
This is my gift to your gina
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
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