Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize