let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
she looked like the before picture.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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