Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize