Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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