what day is it and did you see me today?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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