you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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