can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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