be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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