I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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