About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We left the knife in your bed.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet