shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
