how do flat chested girls get laid?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize