she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
No subtext here. People are naked.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
