Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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