A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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