hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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