whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
