they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
