A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
