I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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