I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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