I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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