Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He keeps bees of course he's weird
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
