it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize