is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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